


You Take Me Apart

by blushingprince



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Restaurant, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Ballroom Dancing, Dancing, Eventual Smut, Falling In Love, Fluff, Homelessness, M/M, Romance, Roommates, Slow Burn, Smut, Trauma, Waiters & Waitresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-01-07 02:47:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12224169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blushingprince/pseuds/blushingprince
Summary: Niles works himself to the bone to make a living. A regular guest at the restaurant needs a favor. Favors are always returned, of course.





	1. Teach me how to dance

Life was as stable as it came for Niles and despite a horrendously pesky landlord, he was standing on his own two feet comfortably. His work was going steady - even overtime had been allowed, and he’d been raking in as many hours as he could in both jobs. Although he spent so much time at the restaurant it seemed like he lived there, he would back to his apartment for a quick bite or snooze, a change of clothes and shower, and turn around for the next destination. It was work, work, work in his schedule. But that was how he made ends meet ever since he graduated. There was no one else to be relied on and if he wanted a roof to sleep under rent needed to be paid.

 

Niles wasn’t picky. He was used to cheap, old things. He thrifted as much as possible and ate instant food. More like, he couldn’t afford to be picky. Simply thinking about the many nights he had gone hungry or without shelter made him shudder. This - anything was better. He had to work hard to keep what he had. To stay comfortable. Sure, he didn’t have much. But he had everything he needed.

 

The restaurant he worked at full-time was a relatively high class, though. After he’d been initially hired they’d made him “clean up” a bit and spend precious money on overpriced clothes. Their clientele was of the upper caliber after all. Nothing but the best for the customer. Yes, sometimes he found himself despising the people who wasted their time here, spending sums on food he couldn’t dream of. Just sometimes, he despised them. He did his best to close off his heart and smile politely. Nothing more, nothing less. If they talked too much, he listened. If they rattled their tongues, too drunk to notice, he listened. But Niles never had a place in his heart for the people of the restaurant. They lived in a world separate from him.

 

It was when he initially started working there that the guests began noticing him. Stolen glances, flirtatious eyes, and then the questions. So many questions and giggles and he knew he was being hit on. Many women, and sometimes men, asking for him, asking about him, asking him too  _ personal  _ questions. It revolted him. He didn’t want to have anything to do with this kind of people. 

 

There was a customer who had started frequenting the place, though, that often left him alone. He came in late - as late as possible - and ate by himself. He dressed sharply in expensive business wear and rarely spoke. It was odd enough for one of the guests to come in alone, but this had been a few times. 

 

Tch. What a rich bastard. What a weirdo.

 

**********

 

It was a normal Saturday evening, as normal as Niles could describe, and he was wiping tables down as the guests dwindled down. Niles began to mentally count the things he needed to do - visit the supermarket, go to the laundromat, get rid of that mold he found in his bathroom….

His eyelids felt heavy; had he gotten enough sleep lately? 

 

_ I need more coffee. _

 

Fixating on his lack of sleep and his list of things to do, he just missed the latest gentleman to enter the vicinity. He stood up with a smile painted on his face and hurried to the front.

 

“Good evening, sir,”

 

So busy doing his bidding, that he did not notice that the gentleman was  _ that guy _ . A man who barely even responded.

 

Niles coughed. “A reservation for one? Right this way.” Niles walked him past a long string of tables to his reserved one. The first time this man ate here Niles had seated him somewhere more pleasant - in a brighter area, really. He arrived at work the next day and was given specific instructions where to seat him. Ha. What a condescending asshole. Was he even capable of smiling?

 

They reached the destination table and Niles handed him the menu. “Let me know if you need anything,” he said courteously with the best smile he could muster. 

 

Niles waited a moment, a good moment, for this man to say anything.  _ Anything. _ As he turned around to return to the tables that needed that cleaning, he heard -

 

“You don’t need to smile,”

 

Niles swiveled around. “Excuse me, sir?”

 

“You don’t need to smile if you don’t want to,”

 

Niles looked at this man: immaculately groomed blonde hair, an overly expensive black suit, and eyes that seemed emotionless. What did this rich bastard have business telling him when to smile or not? Niles was filled with the urge to flip him off but instead opted for a smile.

 

“Thank you for the thought, sir,”

 

The restaurant closed at approximately 2 am. It was then that he went to that man’s table to collect his bill. He opened up the small folder to look at the receipt, hoping to hate him more, when he found a generous tip inside. 

 

_ What? _

 

_ Am I hallucinating? _

 

Niles was unsure how to feel about the money. Happiness….yet frustration that he couldn’t quite understand. 

 

Surely, he would give him back the money the next time the man returned. He wasn’t going to accept this.

 

**********

 

It wasn’t that long before  _ he _ returned again, opting again for a late night reservation and a back of the house seat. After some digging around, Niles learned his name was Leo. Still….not that that mattered.

 

Niles led him to his seat, wondering how to let him know he wasn’t going to take his money. But why? He had taken generous tips from many other clientele before…. What made this any different? Something about the smug look on his face, or his dark eyes as he stared out the window late at night.

 

“Let me know if you need anything, sir,” Niles said as gracefully as possible. He watched Leo look at the menu carefully, waiting for an extra moment.

 

“Ahem, not to be rude, sir,” he watched Leo’s reaction - his eyes searching him carefully, “but I couldn’t possibly accept your courtesy from the other night,”

 

Leo made a reaction for once. His eyes seem to bore into Niles, who was unsure what to do or say. “I hear about other customers giving you generous gifts; is this something you truly cannot accept?”

 

Niles hesitated to respond for a moment. In a smaller voice than he intended, he replied, “I don’t want to be bought,”

 

Leo smiled at him, but for once it wasn’t sarcastic. Niles did not move. “That wasn’t my intention. But if you feel I have done so, I will take it back.”

 

Niles immediately snapped back to his courteous face. “Thank you, sir.”

 

FUCK! What was he doing? He could easily use that money on things he needed. Stupid Niles….He moved away from the table to the next guest but Leo retained his curious gaze on him for the night.

 

************

 

Niles had a long needed day off the next day. He woke to filtered sunlight bathing him in the twin bed in his room. Turning in his sheets, he groaned. There was a lot to get done today. Fall was dwindling closer. The light chill in his room made him pull the covers closer, curling his whole body into himself. In the next moment, though, he threw the covers off and donned the first sweater he could find. 

 

Niles did not by any means have a car. Cars were expensive and so was learning to drive. Every trip was a walk or bus ride. His bike had been stolen a few months prior and he had not been able to replace it. He neared his first stop of the day. A few items were needed at this grocery store. A basket was picked up and he filed easy to make items and on sale vegetables into it. Top it off with a few cleaning supplies and he was done. He paid for the items and left, pacing down the street. A cafe he had been to various times struck his eye. A coffee wouldn’t hurt, right?

 

It was a local coffee house, unlike the overly large and crowded corporate ones with overpriced drinks. The shop itself was relatively small with a few tables and large cushioned chairs. Niles remembered the baristas from the times he had frequented. He didn’t really need a drink with excess sugar or cream; just a simple house coffee really. 

 

Stepping into the building, the aroma of coffee beans easily overtook his senses. It wasn’t unwelcome. The sounds of people chatting and working, the espresso machines at work, and the coffee grinder going were relatively noisy. An old jazz song filed out of the speakers, but not too loud as to bother with the ambiance of the store or the customers’ voices. Niles got into line and waited. He didn’t mind, despite having a bag of groceries. 

 

“Next in line,” called the cashier.

 

Niles moved forward to the counter, mildly surprised he didn’t see anyone he knew there. 

 

“Hi. What can I get for you?”

 

“One medium coffee, please.”

 

“Sure, the coffee’s over there. Cream and sugar are over there, too. Two dollars.”

 

Niles paid and walked over to the canisters to fill his cup up. He looked over the cafe again as he poured a sugar into his coffee and noticed a particular blonde head. Ha. It couldn’t be, right? There’s no way….

 

After making his coffee the way he liked it he walked to a comfortable looking chair and sat down. From across the room, he could definitely see him. For some reason, Leo from the restaurant was in this cafe. Whatever. It’s not like they knew each other. Not a big deal.

 

He pulled out a book from the backpack he had been carrying with him and opened it up. Not a big deal, right?

 

************

 

Ten, twenty, thirty minutes later…. God, he must’ve lost count, and he could’ve sworn he heard a familiar voice approaching him. His eyes were half-lidded; despite the coffee he’d drinking, it was relatively warm in the cafe and he was sleepy. He snapped awake and the blonde man was beside him. 

 

“You look pretty dumbfounded. It’s a new look for you,” the man said. And the man was Leo. 

 

Niles gave the most polite smile he could manage. “I’m terribly sorry.”

 

Leo chuckled. “This act you put on. It amuses me to no end.”

 

Niles raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry?”

 

Leo gave him a strange look. It was sort of smile removed from his usual apathy.

 

Niles hesitated to say anything. 

 

“Niles,” he said as if he was sounding it out on his lips.

 

Niles appeared startled. “Yes?”

 

“That’s your name, right?”

 

He laughed, empty. “Don’t I tell you my name every time I serve you?”

 

“Niles,” he replied. “I’m not trying to ruin your job for you. I honestly just happened to be in this cafe.”

 

What? He….Oh.

 

Niles crinkles his eyes. “Why should I believe you?”

 

“Because,” Leo begins. “The reason I’m here is very embarrassing.”

 

“Then, why are you telling me this at all?”

 

“You’re an interesting person.”

 

“Then,” Niles starts, calm smile brewing on his mouth, “Tell me why you’re here.”

 

And he glanced back to Leo, who is straight up  _ pouting. _ Was he even capable of that?

 

This was quickly becoming  _ incredibly  _ interesting.

 

“Leo,” his voice slithers.

 

And Leo snapped up in surprise. “Wha- how do you know my-?”

 

“But it’s your name, right?”

 

That earned him an eyeroll. Noted.

 

Niles leans closer, close enough to feel Leo’s breath. “Leo, why are you here?”

 

He can see Leo lick his lips under his burning gaze. “Because,” Leo begins, “I’m trying to find a private tutor.”

 

Niles leaned further in, and his mouth is just oh so close to Leo’s ear. “For what?”

 

It seems like eternity passes but Leo finally answers. “So that I can waltz.”

 

“Something as simple as that, you don’t know?” Niles teased.

 

And he looks back and Leo had a faint blush on his cheeks. It was almost cute and he wanted to pinch himself for thinking so. 

 

Niles backed away and so did Leo.

 

“There you have it,” and Leo folded his arms.

 

“Why do you even need to learn to waltz in the first place?”

 

Leo pursed his lips. “It’s complicated. I come from an old family. I have to go to certain formal events.”

 

“Ah, I see, your highness,”

 

Niles is met with another eyeroll. 

 

“What’s wrong with finding a teacher, then?” he perused.

 

“All the women I’ve met so far…” Leo wrinkles his brow, “Have been incredibly annoying. Just trying to get close to me because of my family.”

 

No, Niles. Don’t do this. Don’t fucking do this.

 

“Ha. You’re very picky. A reclusive prince?”

 

Leo sighed.

 

Don’t do this.

 

“It’s just the waltz, right?”

 

DO NOT. DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS.

 

“I can teach you. It’s that easy.”

 

Leo gave him a careful gaze. “You know how to waltz?”

 

“And why wouldn’t I?” He smirked, the corners of his mouth looking very feline.

 

Leo appeared torn for a moment. “Fine. Yes. Ok. Teach me.”

 

You. Are. So. Stupid.

 

“Okay so…. Where will we practice? And you’ll need to work around my schedule.”

 

“My apartment is pretty big we can work there.”

 

_ Of course it is. _

 

Niles smirked. “A little prince in his castle.”

 

They exchange phone numbers and part for the day. Niles lets Leo know that he does indeed have a pretty busy work schedule so to expect him to have little time from the start. But….why did he does this? What the fuck? What the ever living fuck? He collapses on his bed at the end of the dead completely confused. He had just agreed to be a dance teacher for a relative stranger without asking for anything in return. He’s sure that Leo will offer, though. Is this the part where his random ass skills come in handy? Sure….Leo was a tidbit cute but it didn’t mean anything.

 

He was a complete dumbass, he decided, as he drifted off to sleep.


	2. Dance for me, baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Niles grow closer together through their lessons

Niles jolted awake to his blaring phone alarm. It was promptly 7:30 am on his day off and he was scheduled for his first dance lesson with Leo. It all quite hit him in the face, like a wet slap, and he lay there with an arm over his face groaning. Why had he agreed to this, again? Niles wasn’t a person who gave away random generous acts of kindness. There was no reason to act like a spring daisy. 

 

And yet, here he was, getting up - or attempting to - on one of his precious days off to teach someone how to dance. 

 

Niles groaned again and rose out of bed. His appearance in the mirror was rather disheveled and he opted to take a hot shower. Some warm water and fresh clothes later, he was all cleaned up. He glanced over to his phone, where Leo had texted him his address. Niles grabbed a muffin for the bus ride, his phone and wallet, and left. 

 

It took longer than he thought to get to the expensive looking condominiums, which were on the opposite side of town. Niles had to be buzzed in, and then ascended an elevator to a floor he wasn’t sure he’d remember. He finally reached Leo’s door and laughed inwardly. He was quite out of place, huh? It only took a few knocks to get inside… Why hesitate? He had gotten this far.

 

But Leo was quick enough to open the door before he even knocked as if he was anticipating him. Niles’ eyes widened a bit though he hid the surprise. 

 

“Glad you could come,” Leo said matter of factly, moving aside so Niles could enter.

 

Niles wandered into the building and his eyes pressed over every surface: high ceilings, more square footage than he’d ever had, luxury items abundant. He glanced back at Leo and scoffed. “So this is the castle, your highness,”

 

Leo rolled his eyes in response. “Do you want something to drink? I have coffee.”

 

_ That’s not a bad idea.  _

 

“If your princeliness  _ insists _ .”

 

Leo, who seemed keen on ignoring Niles’ comments, moved to the kitchen area and fiddled with the coffee machine for a minute or two. Within moments Niles could hear the sounds of the machine going. Leo sat down on a singular chair. Funny, Niles thought, since there was so much space here but only one person. A small table sat near Leo stacked with books. Eventually, Niles meandered over and took a seat. Leo went to and fro the kitchen and brought coffee. They sat in silence for a moment or two while the initial sips were drunk.

 

“This is really good-!” Niles remarked as if he was surprised he was saying it.

 

“Oh, really?” 

“Not too….exquisite for your simpleton tastes?” Leo perused.

 

Niles saw the smirk, the little light in his eye. “Don’t worry about me,” Niles chided, “I’d be more concerned for you. Eat something made for poor people and you’d flounder like a dandelion in the wind.”

 

“Wow, Niles! I’m surprised you can use your words so well. I thought you only knew how to get the customers to want to sleep with you.”

 

“And here I thought you only knew how to sit in the back of the restaurant and sulk like a baby.”

 

Leo opened his mouth to speak but Niles grinned wide. 

 

“Oh, I’m sorry. My mistake. A really, really spoiled baby.”

 

“I feel like I have made so many mistakes by letting you into my home…” Leo hung his head.

 

“Too-o late,” Niles chimed.

 

*************

 

They had cleared some larger furniture in the room and Niles put on an arrangement of music. 

 

“We’ll start off with you leading,” Niles told him. “Hold onto me over here, okay?” He positioned Leo’s hand onto his waist.

 

“It’s all about the timing. Pay attention to your footwork. If you mess up just keep going.”

 

Niles began to show Leo the steps as they moved across the room. Today they would only cover the basics.

 

The minutes dwindled on with them practicing footwork like that. Leo wasn’t great it at but he wasn’t downright horrible. Niles did his best not to complain about his feet getting stepped on. Niles could almost forget how fucking annoying Leo was when they didn’t talk and the music played over the dance practice. 

 

They stopped for a break, both of them breaking a sweat. 

 

“Say, where’d you learn ballroom dancing?” Leo asked.

 

“Does it matter?”

 

“Just curious. You seem pretty good.”

 

“Oho, is this the great Leo complimenting me on something?” Niles teased.

 

“No one complimented anything.”

 

**************

 

Just like that, it was  _ different _ seeing Leo when he came to the restaurant. 

 

“Good evening, sir. I -”

 

“Pffff. Niles, what’s all this? Just talk to me normally.” 

 

Niles eyes widened a bit. He could talk to Leo normally here?

Just like that. No strings attached.

 

He passed Leo’s table to refill the water and Leo beckoned him closer.

 

“See that woman in the sequined dress? She’s been eyeing you all evening like a ravenous animal.” Leo laughed. A genuine laugh.

 

Niles was startled but then he fell into a chuckle himself. This was new. He could never really talk to anyone about these things. Maybe Leo wasn’t so bad after all.

 

************

 

[text] leo: I’ve been practicing my footwork all week. Though it’s pretty weird by myself

[text] niles: good 4 u

[text] niles: try a blow up doll?

[text] leo: I’m blocking your number

 

************

 

It was more or less not as awkward going back to Leo’s apartment. It was still pretty weird - with the whole super rich vibe. Niles was getting used to being around Leo, though. This time Niles brought a gift.

 

“Instant noodles?”

 

“Yea.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because you need to learn to survive in the real world.” 

 

“I. Am never going to eat these.” Leo announced.

 

Niles sighed tragically like his heart was broken. 

 

“Alright, Leo. Get in position.”

 

“ _ What? _ ”

 

“Show me your dance moves,” Niles chirped. 

 

They pushed the couch back and turned a score of music on, and Leo showed Niles the movements he had been practicing

 

Niles clapped. “Mm. Okay now do that with me.”

 

As they danced, Niles couldn’t help thinking to himself that although he dreaded this from the first day, it wasn’t the worst thing ever at the moment. Leo wasn’t  _ unbearable _ , though he could be annoying. And for some reason the dancing - or whatever they were doing now - felt okay… 

 

It probably didn’t mean anything. Niles always did try to ignore his emotions anyways.

 

The music score ended and Leo paused. 

 

“Hey, we’ve been going at this for awhile. Do you want to eat something?”

 

Niles smiled absentmindedly and then nodded blankly. “Okay..” 

 

Leo walked over to the kitchen and opened his fridge. “Do you want pasta from last night or I can make eggs?”

 

“Either is fine.” Just being offered food was….

 

Leo opted for the pasta and they both waited while it heated up. 

 

“This is actually really good,” Niles exclaimed. “Where did you get it?”

 

“I made it.”

 

“You cook?” Niles did not seem to believe it.

 

“Yes. I like to prepare most of my meals.”

 

“Well. I wouldn’t have guessed it. Oh! Then what about the restaurant?”

“A change of pace. My brother recommended it to me.” 

 

Niles was silent for a moment. “Come to think of it. I don’t know what you actually do.”

 

“Oh, me? I’m a medical student.” Leo kept eating, not realizing it was a big deal.

 

“Medical student….” Niles repeated. Wow….they really were worlds apart.

 

*************

 

“So you should probably need a week or two more of practice and then you can dance it on your own,” Niles explained.

 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to look like a fool out there.”

 

Niles opened his mouth to speak but smiled. “Of course.”

 

“I’ll be on my way then,”

 

*************

 

There weren’t too many things Niles knew about Leo. Yes, he was sarcastic and a brat. But he was also a son from an incredibly rich family and….apparently going to become a doctor. What was he thinking getting involved with someone like Leo? He couldn’t get near people like that. They were worlds apart - they’d never understand each other. Leo had everything given to him on a silver spoon and Niles had to work himself to the bones and scavenge for anything. Niles would always just be some poor kid to Leo. The gap was too big. And he was starting to think they could get along...

 

Niles was so lost in thought that he nearly missed a large piece of paper stuck to his door with angry red lettering. 

 

What?

 

No.

 

His building had been sold to someone else. He couldn’t live there anymore. He had till the end of the month to get out. 

 

Please God, don’t let this be true. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost I want to apologize for being horrible at updating I have so much bad stuff going on in my life that having time to write is like....impossible.  
> Thank you for reading!!! Leaving kudos/comments!!!   
> I'm glad people are interested in this au it makes me excited to write more


	3. I just wanted to survive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niles is having some confusing feelings and is extremely stressed out! Somebody, please help him!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this story goes on the assumption that leo and niles meet more often then the chapters dictate, meaning they have dance lessons or talk more often then I write them interacting

For real? For fucking real? He had worked this hard to make a living every step of the way and this is what he gets? He knew that anything could mess up his life but….Wow. Eviction. Wow. What the fuck. What was he going to do? How could he find a place that fast? His credit scores weren’t incredibly remarkable and it was always hard to find a place in the city. He could try to contact some people he knew….but imposing on other people was hard and at best he could get a few nights on someone else’s couch. Maybe he could stay at a youth hostel for a few nights. But that was no replacement. Niles checked his phone. The month was already almost half over. The best he could do was start searching for a place to live, but he might be homeless come the end of the month.

 

Homelessness. He didn’t think it would come again so soon. Would he be fired from his jobs if they found out he didn’t have a permanent residence? Nowhere to shower and sleep? Tch… Almost instantly, Niles could feel the sensation of gnawing hunger in his belly. The type he used to feel wandering the streets for days. He knew winter was setting in and living on the streets in the cold was even worse. 

 

No, he didn’t want that.

 

But he didn’t have much.

 

*************

 

At work and to the rest of the world he kept a perfect composure. Niles was not a person to keep friends too close. He had acquaintances but held them at an arm’s length. Intimacy was something he did not like. Friends were just people you smiled with. You didn’t  _ talk _ with them. With Leo, even though he continued to go over to his apartment often….it was meaningless. They would never see each other after this was over. Their social statuses were so different. 

 

Meaningless.

 

Life was just a struggle for survival. It was not something he was trying to enjoy.

 

Niles finished cleaning a table and returned from the kitchen. He could spot Leo off to the side, seeming like he was waiting for something. That was amusing because he was obviously looking for an opportunity to speak to Niles.  _ I might as well entertain him. _

 

Niles sauntered over to where Leo waited. “Well?” he asked.

 

“Your tie is all twisted,” Leo responded.

 

“Huh?” 

 

“You were probably thinking of something else while you tied it. Your tie. Its knot is messy.”

 

Niles could tell at the least that Leo meant well but he was emotionally tired. “Oh, well.” he trailed off.

 

Leo clicked his tongue. “I’ll fix it if you won’t. Here, nobody can see.”

 

_ Wha-? _

 

Leo did not give much time for response and began to undo the silky fabric. It was sort of interesting to watch him redo the knot so studiously.  _ A little sexy? No! Absolutely not. _

 

Leo finished and looked up at Niles, who was just a tad bit taller than him. “There.”

 

“Oh,” Niles instinctively patted his redone tie, “Thanks,”

  
  


*****************

 

It was the middle of the day on a Wednesday and Leo and Niles were practicing their waltz in the center of the living room. They were at Leo’s condo, of course, with a classical piece chosen by the blonde this time, who had insisted Niles was always getting to pick. It was easy to lose track of time like this, Niles thought. He hadn’t gotten to practice something so studiously with another in a long time. It was peaceful in the condo and they were never interrupted. Even if Leo was bratty and spoiled Niles was amused by him. 

 

_ Don’t get too comfortable around him. He’s world’s removed from you.  _

 

_ After this is over you’ll never see him again. _

 

_ Don’t get _

 

_ comfortable.  _

 

They stopped for a break and Leo mumbled to himself that he would warm something up in the kitchen. Niles’ eyes slowly watched Leo wipe his sweat off.

 

Leo pranced off to the kitchen and, Niles, somehow having become used to the apartment, followed him.

 

“What are you making?”

 

“An Italian chicken dish,”

 

Niles hummed calmly while Leo prepared food and heated up the meat he already made.

 

“Hey,” Leo called.

 

“Hey,” Niles answered.

 

“You’ve been weird the past week or so,”

 

“Are you sure? Maybe I’m just incredibly weird.”

 

Leo frowned. 

 

“Haha. Didn’t like that?”

 

Leo opened his mouth to speak. “But I just. I’m asking out of concern.”

 

“Don’t worry about it.”

 

Niles knew that Leo would not be happy with that answer so he continued. 

 

“Look, we haven’t known each other for that long. You have no reason to have concern for me. Don’t worry about it.”

 

“Niles. I am feeding you food I made myself. I would have to be the biggest asshole to not care even a little.” Leo looked back at him and did not move.

 

“It’s….nothing. It’s nothing.” Niles clenched his jaw. He would  _ not _ say anything more on the issue.

 

Leo sighed. It’s not like he expected anything. 

 

He brought the food out of the oven and set it down on the table along with clean plates and silverware.

 

It was awkward….but then both men began to eat and for the millionth time Niles was astounded.

 

“This is really good!”

 

“Really?” Leo asked.

 

“I don’t know why you bother eating out if you can make such good food,” Niles commented.

 

“Lots of reasons. But then it just became habit.”

 

“Hmm. By the way, Leo, what the date of the fancy event you have to go to?”

 

“Why this now?”

 

“I just wanna know when you have to perfect the dance by.”

 

“It’s the last day of the month. The 30th.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Nothing, haha,”

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, Niles is suffering and it's all my fault  
> someone save him (Leo)  
> I see those gay feelings, Niles


	4. Brains make no sense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niles gets evicted dun dun dun

It was of no use. He had not been able to find any secure housing yet. Niles was getting increasingly desperate as the end of the month crawled nearer. Forget all the possessions he’d careful accumulated all the time he’d spent here; he just needed a roof over his head. Niles took a look at the rather small and somewhat damp flat he had adjusted to in his time of living here. It wasn’t spacious or luxurious but it was the only place he could call home. He had no family or relatives. No other places to turn to in this time of need. Certainly not a childhood he wanted to recall. Niles squished his eyes shut. It was going to be cold. Maybe he could stay at a shelter. More baggage meant more weight and more likely to get stolen, yet he needed it.

 

Time moved forward no matter how much he fought it, quite like a bursting dam. Ah yes, his life was falling apart. He found himself at work attempting to stave off the anxiety but not doing so elegantly. His mind reeled; it was difficult to stick to the task, to remember the little details that made him a better server. As the hours moved on he knew he was making a mistake and only his well known and liked reputation made up for it. 

 

He cursed it. How could he slip up at work?  _ Separate the matters, Niles. _ Work was work, after all. 

 

He found himself walking home well past midnight, so lost in thought he could not hear his phone buzz. The stars called to him.  _ Soon I will not have a place to sleep.  _

 

He suddenly felt a tidbit stupid and checked the time on his phone to find a text message.    
  
text: [leo] go to sleep already

 

Niles laughed, but it was somewhat empty. 

 

text: [niles] how presumptuous to assume im awake. are you a pervert?

 

text: [leo] shut up I know you were working

 

text: [leo] go to bed already instead of sulking

 

_ He has a point. But I don’t really want to admit that. _

 

text: [niles] night night sweet prince

 

Niles closed his phone before checking Leo’s response. He was sure to evoke something visceral. 

He laid down on his unmade bed and stared at the ceiling. Tomorrow was an off day and he was scheduled to go to Leo’s, so might as well sleep in a bit, savor the feeling of a bed just a teensy bit more. 

 

***************

 

Niles knew this was one of the last times he was ever going to see Leo. He put those feelings away in the back of his jeans like pocket change. They were disposable, they didn’t mean anything. Sure, they had grown somewhat comfortable with each other, and sure, Leo was cute, but it was meaningless to Niles. People were disposable. He would soon never see Leo again, even if his brain told him otherwise. Even if his apartment was warm and his home baked dishes were tasty and his smile was cute. 

 

It had no meaning in a world for Niles. 

 

Nothing was feasible or material in a life where he constantly struggled for survival. He didn’t have that luxury.

 

What a shame….

 

**********

 

Niles ascended the elevator once more to Leo’s condo and knocked on the door in a rather routine manner. Leo answered promptly and it was easy, casual. 

 

“Hey,”

 

“Yo,”

 

The furniture had been left out of the way for the past few weeks, leaving the wide open space for dancing in the living room. They had gotten tired of moving couches and chairs. Niles immediately dove for a cushioned seat. 

 

“What’s up?” Leo asked as he went back into the kitchen

 

“This and that, you know,”

 

“Oh, you know, a really eloquent choice of words that totally helps me grasp what you are trying to say,” Leo replied, walking back to the couch.

 

Niles groaned. “Is all you do  _ insult _ people?”

 

“Yes, that is all I do. Thank you for realizing.”

 

“What a petty  _ princess _ ,” Niles teased.

 

“Niles, I will physically hurt you.”

 

“Try me,”  he said while batting eyelashes.

 

Leo let out a huge groan. “You, cretin, do not deserve the fish fillets I made!”

 

“Fancy?” Niles half murmured.

 

***************

 

Not before long they were up and about into their dance routine. Leo was almost perfect, a perfectionist lead. They moved about the living room floor with grace with the tempo of the music. Leo let Niles in for a drop and Niles felt himself holding his breath for a moment. Silly, right?

 

Niles could tell how much Leo had improved; his movement was graceful and swift and he was sure of what he was doing. 

 

They stopped at their usual break time and Niles was surprised by how sweaty he was. This was somewhat a workout, huh? He suddenly felt a bit awkward being here, in Leo’s apartment, all sweaty and smelling bad, but he brushed it off. After all, Leo was sweaty too.  

 

It was their usual habit to eat after dance practice and Leo immediately went off to the kitchen to do who knows what. Niles turned the music score off and followed, trying to sniff whatever he could out. 

 

Leo served salmon fillets seasoned with paprika and healthy sides of vegetables. Niles was always pleasantly surprised to see whatever Leo was going to serve. It was one thing to get free food, but Leo was an incredible cook.

 

But that’s right. This wasn’t going to continue….Niles would finish giving Leo his dance lessons and then...they would never meet again? Why not? They got along so well.

 

But Niles was going to be homeless. 

 

He couldn’t tell Leo that.

 

No. No way. No fucking way.

 

That’s right, it was better this way.

 

As they wrapped up eating, Niles tried to clear his mind. “Leo,” he began. 

 

“Yes?” the blonde answered.

 

“I think you just need one final dance lesson. And then you’ll be done and ready for your event.”

 

“Ah….oh. That soon?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Are you sure I’m ready?”

 

“You’ve made an incredible amount of improvement with the dance. I’m sure you’ll do great.”

 

“Niles…”

 

“Yes?” he asked quietly

 

“Can I ask, what happens to you after that?”

 

Niles smiled as politely as he could. “That is something you do not need to concern yourself with.”

 

“Niles….I….”

 

Niles knew that Leo was trying to say something, anything. Anything...to keep whatever they had going on. But he steeled himself. He couldn’t have that. 

 

“Leo, I’ll see you at the next lesson.”

 

****************

 

It was tough, the next few days. Facing homelessness was frightening. Preparing for it was terrifying. There was not much on his mind. There was Leo. But...that wasn’t a good idea he kept telling himself.

 

text: [leo] I’m worried about you. But I know you probably won’t answer this text

 

****************

 

It was the last day of their practice and the mood was somber and stiff. The dance portion went exceedingly well, however. On Niles’ terms, Leo passed with flying colors. On the other hand, it was more difficult for the two of them to talk. Leo served a thick meat stew with potatoes and barley. It was somehow like a trap; it was slow to eat and delicious and it made Niles stay longer.

 

Few words were exchanged. It had gotten incredibly awkward. 

 

Niles didn’t want to leave. He really didn’t want to. He didn’t quite have anywhere to return to, either, since the next day he would be evicted. But every instinct in his brain was telling him to run away from Leo. But why? Leo had been so kind and warm and cute to him. Why should he run away…

Brains made no sense.

  
  


“I should go,” Niles blurted out. No! Why!

 

“Ah…”

 

“Niles, I really…” Leo began.

 

Niles got up and made way for the door.

 

“Niles, please don’t go. Don’t tell me I’ll never see you again.”

 

Niles made one final look at Leo. Somehow, he found him beautiful.

 

“I’m sorry,” he said. And he left.

 

******************

 

There was nothing to think about when he got home. He could feel regret coursing through his veins but no time or ability to think about it. He packed what he needed as quickly and carefully as he could. There was nothing left to hope for. He would sleep here one last night. How soon would they kick him out?

Taking a chance was better than nothing.

 

He crawled into his bed one last time, pulling the covers on top of himself, and tried to push off the thoughts of self-hatred. Daylight could only come so soon. 

 

*******************

 

By morning he was ready to abandon his only home. He finished putting together his few bags and items, put them on his back, and left. There was nothing else to do. He might as well wander downtown to where one of the homeless shelters he knew was. 

 

He found himself wandering and didn’t exactly end up at a shelter. It was only a blessing he didn’t have work today. But could he keep a job if he didn’t have a home? There were many questions. He kept wandering. The hours passed on. 

 

There were so many things he wanted to think about. But his mind kept rewinding to Leo. He could’ve given him a chance at something, huh, if he was a better person. If he had better circumstances. If he wasn’t himself. If anything, huh.

 

He was nice.

 

Too nice.

 

********************

Niles awoke from a late afternoon slumber in the back of a cheap cafe to way too many angry text messages. They were from….Leo?

 

text: [leo] I know what’s going on and I’m coming to pick up your phone for the love of God

text: [leo] WHERE ARE YOU NILES 

text: [leo] NILES

text: [leo] ANSWER YOUR PHONE

text: [leo] THIS IS URGENT

text: [leo] DO YOU HAVE FOOD AND WATER

text: [leo] PICK UP YOUR FUCKING PHONE

text: [leo] please text me a location or call me asap

text: [leo] Niles

text: [leo] I’m not leaving you alone till I get a decent reply 

 

What the fuck?

He opened Leo’s contact and hit call.

 

“Hey?” Niles asked.

 

“Hey, Niles?” Leo responded.

 

“Yea, I’m here….”

 

“Ah, okay. Um. I heard, well I saw what happened to your apartment.”

 

“You...did?”

 

“Yeah. Niles...I wish you would have told me about this.”

 

“I….”

 

“It’s okay. Can you just tell me where you are right now?”

 

Niles wasn’t sure if Leo was incredibly stupid or not (well he knew Leo was pretty smart) but he did not know how Leo could help this situation. He gave Leo the address to the building he was in and they hung up.

 

Not even 20 minutes later and Leo entered the cafe.

He looked around briefly, saw Niles (with his bags) and sat down next to him.

 

“Hey,” Leo said.

“Hey,” Niles responded. As much as he was embarrassed to have Leo see him like this, it was a bit of a relief to have the man here with him. 

“Niles, come live with me.”

 

“What?” the younger man sounded flabbergasted.

 

“Why not? I have the space. My condo is way too big.”

 

“You haven’t even known me for that long,” Niles argued

 

“And yet the offer still stands,” 

 

Niles sat there for a few minutes. Homelessness, or living in a luxurious condo with a cute man named Leo. It seemed too good to be true, which is why he was hesitant. Either way, it was better than sleeping on the street.

 

“What’s the catch, your highness?”

 

“I’ll have you know that I am incredibly strict about cleanliness. After that, maybe I can make you a list.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw Leo does end up going to his big ballroom dancey thing but........I didn't put it in the chapter  
> yay!!!! character and plot progress  
> I am really appreciating all the comments I am getting!! thank you so much everyone


	5. Netflix and chill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Niles are now living together!! see the disaster from Leo's pov!!

Leo sat in his warm high rise apartment and it was comfortable despite the cold temperatures outside. Well, it was supposed to be comfortable. The tv displayed a movie in bright, moving colors but Leo wasn’t exactly watching. He sat on a sturdy couch with a beverage at his disposal. Not really in his interest. Immediately to his right was a man just a smidge taller than him and definitely more invested in the movie playing on the television. Said man lazily shoved popcorn into his mouth, leaning into the side of the couch while his sweater hung loosely on him. 

 

Leo was very distracted.

 

Leo was not the type of person to get distracted by someone else. He bit his fingernails, annoyed. Niles’ very presence seemed to take up a whole section of his thoughts. And why didn’t his clothes fit properly? He could  _ see _ some skin there.

 

No, it was nothing to worry about. Of course.

 

Niles had been there for relatively two weeks. Leo had invited him, of course. Leo tapped his fingers against the nearest surface he could find.

 

_ Of course, it was right for me to give him a place to stay. Why would I not? Fucking idiot would never take care of himself.  _

 

“Mm, Leo,”

 

Leo snapped out of his thoughts. “Yes?”

 

“No more tapping fingers I can’t hear the movie,”

 

Leo rolled his eyes.  _ Ok.  _

 

“I’ll go make some more popcorn. Do you want something to drink?

 

It took Niles a moment to respond, seeing as he was taking the film seriously. “Yea, bring one of the sodas I bought,”

 

A pause.

 

“I know you’re making a disgusted face, your princeliness,”

 

Leo coughed, loud and forced, and moved to the kitchen to grab food. 

 

Niles was… certainly interesting. When they first met he was a breath of fresh air in his stuffy life. And then he had slowly felt that creeping longing of lust crawl up his throat. Lust and desire, the fluttering of his heart, and a mix of emotions he hadn’t felt since who knows when. But it was time to cap that up and throw it away. He was good at that type of thing, discarding emotions, acting inhuman. Niles has obviously shown no interest when he walked away that one night, but now they were living together. He had to be civil. He had to treat Niles with courtesy and respect like any friend would. No crushes allowed. 

 

Even if he came out of the bathroom last night with just sweatpants on because he forgot to bring a shirt in to get dressed… and my God he was really attractive. 

 

Niles. Was. Just. A. Friend.

 

Friends didn’t stare at each other’s open expanses of skin dreamily or think about how they smelled. Friends did not do things like that. Friends did not think about how soft each other’s hair probably was. Friends did not think about each other just as their eyelids were closing shut due to sleep.

 

_ I am such a bad person. Fuck. _

 

Leo walked slowly back to the living room, armed with popcorn and Niles’ coke. He could do this. He could get through this and be a good friend. He was just… having feelings. And feelings, as far as he knew in life, got him nowhere. 

 

If only he could turn them off.

 

“Welcome back, princess,” Niles drawled out, as Leo set down the food and took his seat. “Took you long enough,”

 

“If I’m the princess then why am I doing the serving?” Leo asked with a light smirk.

 

“I already am a server. I do enough of that outside. You have to get more experience.”

 

Leo paused, inquisitively. “Niles, does that mean you are going to join me in medical school?”

 

“You’re a little shit, you know that?”

 

****************

 

Leo’s apartment was big enough so there was a spare bedroom, but there was still only one main bathroom to share. Niles kept his things in the spare bedroom though he often lounged around in the center of the open concept building. Leo was a cleaner person at habit; Niles was a messier person but not really a slob. It was easy to divide things in the apartment, but they more or less shared the space and Niles insisted on paying Leo a dividend of the rent, albeit small. Niles did not do much cooking and opted for instant dishes. Leo nagged on and on about this and did his best to prepare food. It was interesting to Leo, how different they were, but how easy it was to live together. 

 

They seemed to just meld together.

 

On a slow afternoon when Leo didn’t have school and Niles didn’t have work Leo was tidying up. Moreso “extreme cleaning.” Armed with his cleaning supplies and vacuum he was rather frightening. Leo loved to clean and he liked to keep things a particular way. He was nothing short of a neat freak. By the time he came to Niles’ room he brought every tool he thought he might need - vacuum, duster, windex, anything at all.

 

“Niles, I’m coming in,”

 

The door opened and Leo laid eyes on the entirety of the room. Niles was by no means a slob but to Leo, who lived for cleanliness, it was a disaster. He furiously began to pick things up off the floor.

 

“Leo, it’s okay, I promise to clean and vacuum and everything. You don’t have to.”

 

Leo did not know how to compromise this.

 

He continued to attempt his process, picking up things and cleaning and altogether doing too much. Reaching very close to the bed where Niles was laying down, he stood up too fast and effectively tripped over his vacuum. 

 

Wha----t

 

Leo had closed his eyes reflexively when he fell, couldn’t imagine what he fell on, till he opened them and saw Niles underneath himself. 

 

_ OH GOD NO. _

 

“I’m sorry, I-”

 

Leo scrambled to try to apologize, while also trying to scramble to get up.

 

“Leo, it’s ok. Don’t worry.” 

 

Niles’ voice was cool and soft. His eyes were a clear, calm blue. Leo did his best to climb off Niles “safely.”

 

Mortification washed over Leo in multiple singeing waves as he stood there in Niles’ room. Oh God, what had he done?? He slowly picked up his cleaning supplies and left, trying to be as quiet as possible, but not really sure what to say. He really fucked it up this time….

 

*****************

 

Leo just wanted to be a good person and a good friend to Niles. Why did feelings have to get in the way? His emotions always had to ruin everything. Niles was special… he wanted to treat him right. He deserved the best. Why couldn’t he just not feel? That desire for him - it was so unnecessary. It was obvious that Niles would never see him that way. The other man probably just saw some rich spoiled brat. Oh, God, how hard his heart had beat when they landed on top of each other. He was so stupid! To think he just go into someone else’s room like that! To think that anyone else would ever hold affection in return for him….was ridiculous.

 

He decided to cook Niles an “I’m Sorry,” breakfast as he left for school. He covered it up and put his name on top just in case Niles would forget and not eat breakfast.

 

******************

 

Leo came home later that night and it looked like Niles had just returned home too. Keys, not his, were on the counter, along with restaurant leftovers. Leo took off his shoes and went to his room to slip into more comfortable clothes. 

 

Now donning a warm sweatshirt, Leo lazily walked into the kitchen for a glass of orange juice. What should he do for the rest of the night? Some homework, and maybe continue that book he was reading?

 

He heard footsteps, and sure enough, Niles trickled by.

 

“Hey,”

 

“Hey,” Leo replied.

 

“Thanks for breakfast. I keep telling you though you don’t have to make me food,” Niles smiled his little wry smile.

 

“Haha, but then you’ll never eat,” Leo chuckled, holding his juice.

 

Niles rolled his eyes. “How was school?”

 

“Busy, the usual, you know. Lots of work to do.”

 

“I see,”

 

“How was work?” Leo asked.

 

“The usual, you know. We went through quite a bit of wine.” Niles chuckled.

 

“Are your customers drinking too much, Niles?”

 

“Absolutely not. They tip better when they’re not fully aware.”

 

“Oh good God,” Leo sighed. “Have you eaten dinner?”

 

Niles attempted to cover his mouth as he yawned. “Not yet, but I brought back plenty of leftovers. You?”

 

“I didn’t have any time, no.”

 

“Oh, delicious, coming from someone who always pesters me about getting my meals,” Niles teased.

 

“Shut up,”

 

“You wanna watch something on tv and eat?” he suggested.

 

“But you know how much I hate eating on the couch….and I never pay attention to the tv,” Leo whined.

 

“Leo, Leo, you have a tv you might as well use it.”

 

“Fiine. I’ll do my homework after we eat.” 

 

“Homework for dessert? Delicious!” Niles exclaimed.

 

“I am currently walking to the couch and ignoring you so please go heat the food up.”

 

They sat there on the couch for hours - the time passing without realizing. They talked over the crappy soap operas and sitcoms about their days and thoughts. Even as Leo got his homework done he didn’t retire to bed, but he stayed there with Niles. It was after midnight when Leo had fallen asleep, slumped against Niles’ shoulder. The television only played the strangest of programs. Niles sat there, not quite watching, but enjoying the sensation of Leo leaning on him, listening to the sound of him breathing. He thought, of how nice this was, of how nice this could be, of how much more he could want. But that wasn’t possible. So he left himself with only wanting. After all, he was always good at denying himself what he wanted. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> good lord they're like GOING OUT BUT THEY DON'T REALIZE IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


	6. Love is tender, love is cruel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niles and Leo are feeling more and more awkward around each other I wonder why

Gentle sunlight of early dawn dripped in through the curtains, illuminating two pairs of sleeping faces. Leo’s blonde eyelashes fluttered and he stirred, feeling at peace yet his body wanting to wake. Slowly, slowly, ever so slowly, his eyelids opened, as if they were just born anew. He took a moment to take in his surroundings. Yes, he was warm in his large bed as always but it seemed like he wasn’t alone? Upon further sleepy examination, it seemed that there was an arm wrapped around him, and he could definitely feel a warm body pressed against to his. Somebody else holding him? For some reason to sleepy Leo, it did not feel quite so bad. He closed his eyes. He liked this. 

 

Leo’s eyes shot open. 

 

This was not just anybody. This was Niles in his bed. He did his best to recover the memories from last night. Surely this was just an innocent event. After all, he was still fully clothed.

 

If he could recall correctly, Niles was in his room last night, as they were talking about rather deep subjects. Rather, Niles had been in his room often as of late….But it wasn’t anything indecent! They simply talked for hours on end. And it seemed that since Leo had such a large and luxurious bed, maybe once or twice Niles fell asleep on it.

 

Leo was okay with that. It was Niles, after all, and he trusted Niles. 

 

But now, they were cuddling. How did that happen overnight? Why would Niles cuddle him? He must have mistaken him in his sleep for a past lover… Leo was not complaining about being held like this….he loved it so much it made his heart scream. But he knew Niles did not want to genuinely do something like this. 

 

He should wake Niles. Probably. It would be awkward. “Sorry I held you like I loved you even though I don’t.” Leo tried to piece together various ways in his head how to phrase things as he suddenly felt movement and heard a stifled yawn. Niles tucked his head into Leo’s neck and hugged him more tightly. For a moment. And no one moved. Slowly, Niles lifted his head and Leo could tell he realized the situation. 

 

A warm arm left his waist as Niles detached himself from Leo. Leo turned around to face the man he desired so much. 

 

Niles did not quite meet his eyes. “Sorry…”

 

Was he….blushing? Was he embarrassed? That’s impossible. 

 

Leo cleared his throat. “It’s ok. Please don’t worry about it.”

Niles still didn’t meet his eyes. “I’ll make sure not to sleep in your bed again..” 

 

Leo wanted to say something, anything, to take the look off his face. It was okay. It was more than okay. 

 

“Hey, don’t worry about it...I’ll make breakfast, alright?”

 

He had little to offer Niles in the end. But Niles’ eyes lit up a bit.

 

“What would it be this time?”

 

“French toast.” Leo grinned.

 

“I look forward to it,”

 

Leo padded off to the kitchen after washing up, making busy work of the milk and eggs. He added his finest spices and when the bread slices were finally added to the frying pan it was a quite enticing smell of cinnamon and cloves.

 

Niles found himself in the kitchen watching Leo prepare the food, a habit he greatly enjoyed. It was so domestic and unlike anything he previously experienced. He liked to watch Leo move around in the kitchen, where he kept everything, how he did things.

 

“Should we put strawberries on?” Leo asked faintly.

 

“Yeah. I bought some whip cream the other day,” Niles responded. 

 

“You do like sweet things, really,” Leo laughed.

 

“What can I say,” Niles moved towards the coffee maker to get it started.  _ I like you.  _

 

***************

 

Niles had told Leo that he was going to meet up with his friend Odin and it just so happened that Leo decided to tag along. It wasn’t a big deal. They had gone places before together.

 

Odin wanted to meet at a quite unusual eatery so he texted Niles the address.

Leo insisted on driving and Niles was in no mood for public transit. They had to go from an eastern part of town to the center where most of the popular eateries and bars were, which wasn’t a big deal, but parking was horrendous. It took at least fifteen solid minutes to find parking and Leo wanted to tear his hair out. 

 

“I was just joking. Does my hair look alright?”

 

“Not a single one out of place.”

 

They entered the restaurant and requested a table. To both of their chagrin, Odin was still not there and Niles had to backtrack and remember Odin’s hobby of always being late. Tsk. 

 

“Why don’t we just get a drink while we wait?” Leo suggested.

 

“Really?”

 

“I mean, Niles, there’s alcohol here and not much else to do.”

 

“You have a point,” Niles agreed.

 

“What do you want, I’ll pay,” Leo said.

 

“You can’t pay for everything, your highness,”

 

“Oho, but I will this time,” Leo grinned and walked towards the bar.

 

Leo moved towards the bar and waited to place his order. 

 

“What can I get for you?” the bartender asked.

 

“Can I get a glass of Cabernet and one vodka orange juice,”

 

“Of course,”

 

As Leo waited for his drinks, a woman turned towards him. “Your boyfriend sure is cute,”

 

“He’s not my -”

 

The bartender returned with Leo’s drinks and the tab. Leo paid, tipping extra, and returned to his table with Niles.

 

“Ooo, what’d you get me?” Niles cooed.

 

“Juice. Any sign of your friend?” Leo asked.

 

“He said he should be here soon. Juice?” 

 

“If you don’t like it you can have mine,” Leo told him.

 

“M’sfine,” Niles took a sip of his concoction. 

 

Within a few minutes not one, but two figures approached their table. Niles seemed to recognize them. One of them blonde, seeming very loud, accompanied by someone with greyish hair.

 

“Oh, Niles, how are you on this fine day!” the blonde one asked, sitting down.

 

“I was better.” Leo took note of this moment to notice Niles’ arm was somewhere around his shoulder.

 

“Always a killjoy nowadays, aren’t you?” The grey-haired man joined in.

 

“Leo,” Niles turned to him, “these dumbasses are Odin and Laslow. We used to work together, or something.”

 

“Well Odin may certainly be a dumbass, but I, for one, am intelligent,” Laslow interjected.

 

“You fail to grasp the fundamentals of heroism, Laslow!” Odin replied.

 

“But hey, Niles, who is this Leo you brought. Not like you to be so social.” Laslow suddenly asked Niles.

 

“Is he, by chance, of your romantic affection?” Odin wondered.

 

It was dead silent for a moment. Niles chuckled softly. “Of course not. We’re roommates.”

 

_ Oh. _

 

_ Oh. _

 

_ Of course. I’m so dumb. _

_ Leo, why do you let yourself believe that anything means something? There’s no way he could love you. _

 

_ You have nothing. And you’ve always had nothing. _

 

_ *************** _

 

Back at the apartment, Niles retreated to his room and Leo did the same. Leo found himself laying in bed doing nothing, save for thinking how Niles did not love him. It was late at night and he prodded to the kitchen for something to drink. He saw Niles sitting at the table they usually sat at but he didn’t seem to be doing anything.

 

“Leo…”

 

Oh. Woops. It seems like Niles had seen him. 

 

“Hi,” Leo responded.

 

“My friends were… a little rude. I’m sorry.”

 

Leo’s heart felt heavy. He was tired. He just wanted to go to his room and cry. He felt the tears now but he didn’t want Niles to see and have his pity. He didn’t want Niles’ pity, out of anyone’s.

 

“It’s ok. You were just telling the truth.”

 

Leo did not wait for Niles’ reaction. He was tired and bone weary from life and from people hurting him. From people wearing him down all his life. He walked back to his room and cried as softly as he could so Niles could never hear. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god I really meant to update sooner but I had a convention and I was making cosplay and then I was drawing and I'm a mess but I love this story and leoniles and everything is going down in flames for them right now please pray for them


	7. there's more than one way to say I love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hahahahahahaha

Niles paced around the apartment nervously - a quick cantor that left footsteps all over the woodwork. How could he have fucked up this bad? Granted, it was not as if Leo loved him, but the way his face looked, the way his eyes were downcast and he looked ready to cry… It tore him apart in the worst of ways and made him want to twist up into nothing. Leo meant so much to him, infinitely more than he could conjure in his own words and he would never want to hurt him like that. To damage the heart of the one he cherished the most. 

 

Leo was special to him, something he would most definitely never tell someone else. Yes, it was special getting to know him. He put up a harsh front, wanting to appear rough but the Leo Niles knew was infinitely more tender than he could speak of. Leo was long nights illuminated by the moon, warm and serene. Leo was the bright stars in the sky, oh how he tried so hard in everything he did. Leo was home, he was fresh baked goods and a clean bedroom. Leo was everything. He was warm and he was love.

 

These were not the kinds of things that were easy for Niles to say, and for him, who had not experienced much love or light in the first place, he was very much unwilling to risk ruining this. He cherished what he shared with Leo more than anything and held it close to his heart. He might love Leo with more than anything he had, but he would never dream of it being returned. He was okay with that. That’s how he lived.

 

Niles came from a life where he built himself up from the ground upwards. He had been abandoned at a young age and had to scavenge to survive. There were many homeless and sleepless nights. There was scant love. It was light to say that he did not think highly of himself. It was all he could do to push forward and survive, sometimes on instincts alone. 

 

Niles was not a person who would dream of someone else loving him. To him, loving someone else was enough. That was all he needed. A warm place to sleep, food in his belly.

 

But to think that he could hurt that very cause of his affection twisted and gnarled his heart in ugly ways, pushing away sleep further than he could imagine. Leo meant more to him that he himself could measure out… and here he was doing this to him. That look on Leo’s face before he disappeared into his bedroom remained embedded in his mind as the hours prowled on. 

 

How could he fix this? He knew little about these types of affairs. Yes, he had friends and he knew all types of people but he knew so  _ little  _ about  _ this. _ It was more than presumptuous to assume Leo felt anything of friendship towards him and he wasn't willing to go down that route. He just needed to help Leo. He wanted to make him smile. Leo smiling was everything and all he needed. 

 

Should he… approach the door? In his mind, he knew that he did not deserve to, already crossing over the border of no return when he embraced Leo in his sleep. Oh, how wonderful that was. It was as if Leo was made to fit into his caress. He slept so soundly that night, unlike all the other nights, dreaming of blonde hair and soft skin he would die to kiss. It was only when he woke that he realized he had crossed a line. Leo did not seem as upset as he thought he’d be but….he felt so truly awful. So truly disgusting for embracing him and thinking those things. 

But Niles knew that facing Leo front on would be the only way to cure this issue. Would Leo be crying up in his bedroom? He seemed terribly upset and Niles, thinking of Leo crying alone in his bedroom felt his heart break into a thousand pieces. How could he let Leo be alone like that? Even if Leo hated him, cursed him, detested him so, he could never want Leo to be alone when he felt such pain. Even more so if he was responsible for the ailment. 

 

He could not let Leo be alone. If he was sleeping, he would simply go away.

 

Niles approached Leo’s door, trying to listen to any faint noises that would give him any indication. Slowly, he raised his hand up and knocked lightly. After a moment he spoke.

 

“Can I come in?”

 

There was no answer at all. Niles gripped the doorknob in frustration. After a minute or two he gently pushed the door open. Surely enough, Leo was curled up in his large bed, a multitude of blankets overtaking him.

 

He could hear the sound of Leo’s breath. Heavy. He moved closer to Leo who did not react to him entering the room. Niles climbed atop the bed. “Leo?” he just above whispered.

 

The mound of blankets shifted and Leo slowly turned towards him, eyes swollen red looking up at him. Niles’ breath hitched and he wanted to reach out, anything, something.

 

“Hi,” Leo blurted out, trying to remain very neutral.

 

“Hey,” Niles responded.

 

Leo inhaled slowly and bit his lips. “What’s up? Do you need something?”

 

Niles stared dumbly back at Leo. He fumbled for words. “No...I...Wanted to see if you were ok.”

 

Leo laughed quickly. “Why would I not be?”

 

Niles scooted closer. “You were pretty upset earlier.”

 

Leo waved his hand. “Ts’okay. I’m fine.”

 

“Are you sure I- …. I’m here.”

 

Leo coughed, but it sounded like it was forced. “Of course,”

 

“I don’t want you to be unhappy,” the words were out before Niles knew.

 

Leo smiled wryly. “And why is that?”

 

Niles looked back and did not know what to say. 

 

Leo chuckled to himself. 

 

“Leo,” Niles started. “You’re important. You’re really important. I….”

 

“Of course. I helped you out when you were in a bad situation.”

 

_ No! No. That’s not it. _

 

_ Just say it, Niles. Just tell him. _

 

_ But I don’t want to lose him…. _

 

“That last dance session we had,” Leo began, “I asked you to stay. But you didn’t.”

 

“Leo, please, it’s not-”

 

“I think you should go out. I’d like to get some rest.”   
  
“Of course,”   
  
*************

 

The next few days were awkward, to say the least. Leo avoided Niles and it was obvious. But Niles was still unsure exactly what he had done wrong. He tried to rewind in his head what happened over and over again but he could not land on the conclusion. The days drowned into a week and the next and Niles found himself talking to someone else about it which was extremely weird, since he did not confide his issues in people.

 

“Have you tried just talking to him?” Laslow asked.

 

“He just gives me short one word answers.”

 

“You must have really ticked him off, huh.” he paused. “But Niles, it’s weird for you to care so much about someone. Do you really not like him?”

 

Niles tried to open his mouth to deny it but fell silent. “It doesn’t matter if I like him or not,” he added quietly.

 

“Of course it does! It makes this whole damned thing make more sense!” 

“What the fuck do you mean, Laslow?”

 

Laslow laughed. “What did Odin say when you brought him over?”

 

Niles tried to backtrack in his thoughts.  _ Oh. _

 

“If he’s really concerned that much over you rejecting him in such a nonchalant manner, he must really fucking like you,” Laslow cracked a smile.

 

“That’s impossible.”

 

“Okay,” Laslow began, “any other bright ideas why he’s avoiding you? No one gets that upset about small things.”

 

“Well, fuck me,” Niles muttered.

 

*************

 

Was it really possible for Leo to like him? Niles walked around town for the rest of the day with his mind in a jumble. How could he wrap his mind around this idea? Sure he had fantasized once or twice or maybe a lot about the man but….the very idea of someone loving him gave him shivers. How could he accept someone’s love? But if it was Leo, he would take anything, anything and everything until he died. 

 

Would he be willing to test the waters out or would he hide forever? As it was, Leo was ignoring him and things were not getting any better. He was at his wit’s end and he did not want to lose Leo too.

 

Niles headed home with his mind made.

 

It was late when he came home and he knew that Leo would be home soon too. They hadn’t been eating together and there were various leftover containers in the fridge. Niles waited for the door to click open with Leo.

 

Niles was clearly visible in the living room but Leo walked right past him, removing his coat and shoes, and putting his keys on the counter. 

 

“Hey,” Niles called out.

 

No response.

 

“Hey,” Niles called again.

 

No response.

 

Niles got up and followed Leo into his room. 

 

“Why’re you following me?” Leo asked.

 

“Oh, so you can actually see me?” Niles laughed.

 

“Go away. I have homework to do.”

 

“Not gonna happen. Sorry, your highness.”

 

Niles walked straight up to Leo, grabbed him by the collar, and kissed him.

 

It wasn’t exactly romantic but it was the only way he knew how.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> am I sadist? am I masochist? please enjoy and feel some pain


	8. you tell me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fluff. fluff. fluffy.

Leo immediately pulled away from the kiss and Niles’ hand slipped off his collar.

 

“Niles!” Leo shouted, “What the fuck?”

 

“Mm, seems like you can see me now, definitely.” Niles retorted.

 

“Is this some sort of silly game to you?” Leo seethed with anger.

 

“Is it a game to you? Do you think the only way to get my attention is by avoiding me?” Niles’ gaze pierced him.

 

Leo was silent. “That’s not… that’s not what I was doing,” he quietly responded.

 

No one spoke.

 

“Do you think,” Leo began, voice shaking, “that the only way to get  _ my  _ attention is to feign affection?”

 

The look in Niles’ eye shifted. “You still think I’m faking,” he said slowly.

 

“Of course,” Leo spat, his breath heavy.

 

Niles moved closer, wrapping one arm around Leo and cupping his face with the other. Slowly, slowly, as if it were a dream or trance that they were both having.

 

His lips moved closer to Leo’s and no one spoke. Niles lips were upon Leo’s, so slow, so easy, so soft. With the most gentle gradualness, he could feel Leo kiss him back. It was a tender exchange of quick breathe and pliant lips. 

 

Leo separated from his mouth. “I fail to understand why you do this.”

 

“I used to think that you were the smart one, Leo,” Niles whispered.

 

Leo shook with frustration. “You have already demonstrated twice that you feel nothing for me. What more do you want?” his voice very nearly broke.

 

“It’s easy to lie and run away. Being honest….is much more of a challenge.” Niles answered, voice scarcely a whisper.

 

“And so?” Leo breathed. 

 

They were holding each other, somehow. Niles softly took Leo’s hand in his own and placed a kiss on it. “I’m not one for romance or knowing about love. I’m bad at this. Really bad. I know though, that I love you.”

As Niles waited for Leo to respond and say something - anything, really, he expected the worst. There were obviously some mechanical gears going on his head as he stared blankly out. Niles knew, worst things worse he’d have to find a new place to live but his heart already ached at the idea of losing Leo. He was not a confident man, and he was not confident he would be accepted.

 

“I…” Leo tried to start, fumbling with his words. “Niles….It’s always been you.”

 

“I’m sorry?” Confusion washed over his face.

 

The words just started pouring out of Leo and he could not stop.“When I started going to your restaurant. I mean it was just a place my brother recommended me to eat some meals. But I liked watching you. I came back again and again because you intrigued me. I always wanted to say something but I was too shy. And then you started giving me dance lessons and God I was  _ so embarrassed, do you know how attractive you are? _ But you were so easy to get along with… I never wanted that time to end. It’s hard for me to find people like that… And then… I wanted to help you out when you were nowhere to go but I told myself that you were just a friend. I always liked you. I… I’m just so bad with these things!” Leo looked up in frustration, his whole face now painfully red.

 

_ God, that’s so fucking cute. That’s really cute. _

 

“I do love you,” Leo added very quietly, “but I never thought you could love me back,”

 

Niles wrapped his arms around Leo and held him tightly. “I’m sorry. I’m here now.” Leo hugged back burying his face in Niles. 

 

Leo spoke up. “I think we need to redo that kiss,”

 

Niles hummed in agreement. “I agree, my prince.”

 

Leo pulled Niles down into it, their lips meeting as he smiled and wrapped his arms around Niles’ neck. Niles licked Leo’s bottom lip, inviting his mouth to open. Leo seemed a lot more comfortable now as he snaked his tongue into Niles’ mouth. Nothing was rushed. It was slow and easy. They had enough time jumping around each other. Suddenly, Leo yelped.

 

Niles picked him up bridal style and deposited both of them onto Leo’s enormous plush bed. Well, there certainly was a lot more room for kissing there. 

 

**************

 

“If we’re going to be a couple now I want to ask questions,” Niles perused.

 

“What could you possibly want to know?”

 

Leo sat in Niles’ lap at this point. They hadn’t exactly done anything non-innocent, agreeing to take it slow. 

 

“Well, that one time you left me a huge tip. What was that about?” Niles wondered.

 

“Ah……” 

 

“C’mon, Leo,”

 

“I was just trying to get your attention. I would watch you flirt with all sorts of people and all the clientele shower you with affection and it made me  _ a little _ annoyed because I wanted to talk to you.” 

 

“So you threw money at me,” Niles laughed.

 

“It wasn’t like that!!” Leo cried.

 

“Okay. You go now.”

 

“A question?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“When we were still doing dance lessons you would joke around with me but you were still really distant and I never really understood why.” Leo articulated.

 

“Ah.” Niles chuckled. “You were really cute but I was trying to not get attached. What about you? Why did you care?”

 

“Niles,” Leo pouted, “do you think I just serve homemade food to any stranger?”

 

Niles paused. And grinned. “No.”

 

“Obviously, I was already crushing on you.” Leo’s face was bright pink and he was glad he was facing away from Niles. 

 

“Oh!” Leo began, “What about the time you fell asleep in my bed and cuddled me?”

 

“Leo,” Niles groaned. “Let’s just say it was some wishful thinking,”

 

“Well….you’re not unwelcome here let’s just say,”

 

“I will gladly take that invitation.” Niles pressed a kiss to the top of Leo’s head.

 

****************

 

“So you said this thing about me being really attractive?” Niles called out to the kitchen while Leo stirred a thick tomato stew.

 

“You know what. You need to learn to shut the fuck up.” Leo called back, face red as the stew.

 

“These are incredibly ungraceful words from his highness,” 

 

“I will. Attack You. With this ladle.” 

 

Niles snuck into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Leo’s waist. “You want to do some bdsm stuff? Okay.”

 

“911 hello operator I need to break up with my boyfriend.”

 

“Hey,” Niles said.

 

“What’s up?”

 

“It’s really cute when you call me your boyfriend,”

 

“Niles, why do you always have to say the most embarrassing thing possible?” Leo held one hand to his face.

 

“I dunno, maybe because I’m incredibly attractive and I don’t know it.”

 

“I hate you,”

 

“What! You just told me you loved me,”

 

“I’m taking it back,”

 

“You’re trying so hard to be a dom, Leo,”

 

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!,”

 

************************

 

It was late night and they cuddled for warmth in the depth of Leo’s bed. Leo pressed soft kisses on the outline of Niles’ face, running his fingers through fluffy white hair.

 

“Leo?”

“Yea?”

 

“Thank you,”

 

“For what?” Leo was curious.

 

“For everything. For wanting to know me, for letting me into your home… for… loving me.”

 

Leo held Niles tightly. “You don’t have to thank me for that. But okay.”

 

It was silent for a bit. “I never thought I would come to love someone and that they would love me,”

 

“Are you glad?” Leo asked quietly.

 

“More than I can express,” he replied. 

 

Leo pressed a chaste kiss to Niles’ lips. “I’m glad then. I will always be here for you,”

 

It was Niles’ turn to burrow his head into Leo, his arms encircling Leo. He wanted to bury himself in this man forever. They held each other till sleep came and twilight filled the room. As long as they had each other, all would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so the fic isn't actually over I was gonna continue it and explore them dating so at this point you can suggest things you'd like to see and maybe I will use them! bother me on twitter @blushingprince also the comments are ok too.
> 
> also I was not totally writing this chapter cackling really hard as the weather went Death and I drank my tea
> 
> enjoy the fluff, my dear readers


	9. dinner date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niles has a lot to think about before he and Leo go on a date

It had only been a few days since they kissed. Niles and Leo were now officially in a relationship and enjoying that tender honeymoon phase. It had been long months of pining for each other and Niles was glad to be able to reach out and know he was not rejected. For once in his life, there was something, someone who wanted him. A place he could call home - a person’s embrace he welcomed himself into. It was bliss. Gone were the awkward stares and longings. Leo was shy, yes, but he would end up in Niles lap nonetheless and the both of them breathless. They hadn’t gone past that line though, agreeing that it was too early and they needed to take it slow. That didn’t stop Niles from teasing Leo every chance he could get and peppering him with kisses. It was nice, for a change, to be able to show affection. It genuinely made him feel better. 

 

It was still…a little hard to believe that everything worked out. He was still a little scared. Very scared. Relationships were terrifying and he tended to avoid them like the plague. But for Leo, Niles wanted to try. Could someone really like him?

 

“What? What is it?” Leo nudged, his nose peeking out a book.

 

A light smile tilted Niles’ lips. “Nothing,”

 

The book was moved to the side. “It’s never  _ nothing _ with you Niles. Please enlighten me what you’re thinking about.”

 

Niles feigned injury. “How could you  _ hurt  _ me like, Leo? You know I care for you so dearly, and yet you wound me like this? What kind of lover  _ are  _ you?”

 

Leo rolled his eyes. “I’m a cruel bastard keeping you hostage,” Leo deadpanned.

 

Niles leaned in on the couch they were sitting in. “Ooooh, I like that,” he said, licking his lips. “Is that why sometimes… when you think no one is looking… you vacuum your clothing? Got a case of cruel bastard in you, huh?”

 

Leo’s eye visibly twitched as he yelled. “Niles!” His face puffed up with embarrassment. “I will admit to no such claims.”

 

Niles enjoyed every second of Leo. Even if Leo did make tomato juice protein smoothies for breakfast. So when Leo suggested they go on a date, he was happy to oblige. It made him a bit nervous, however, when Leo took charge. 

 

Would they go somewhere expensive? Would he be out of place? What would he wear? He did have some clothing from work, but… 

 

“Niles,” Leo gently called. “Hey,”

 

“Yeah?” He was a bit more panicked then he let on. The first date with his new boyfriend? Suddenly, things were too real.

 

A warm hand reached out and rubbed his shoulder. Leo. “Hey, it’ll be fun, okay?” Leo smiled at him. Oh, how much Niles loved that smile.

 

Niles felt himself smile back, nodding. Yes, this would be good. It would be fun. He didn’t have to worry every single second. Leo leaned up and kissed him and Niles wrapped his arms around the small of Leo’s back. They stood there for a few minutes, simply holding each other. Niles slowly began to spread kisses on his boyfriend’s exposed neck. 

 

“So when is this date, hm?” Niles murmured.

 

Leo closed his eyes and enjoyed the attention. “Mm, you’re off Monday right? That night then?”

 

“It’s a date,” Niles answered with a sly grin, reaching to kiss Leo. 

 

Leo wrapped his arms around Niles’ neck, eager for more. They stood there, slowly kissing, slowly tasting each other, caught in a daze of breath and hot lips.

 

*************

 

Niles could admit that Leo did a good job of easing his anxiety but the fact that he wasn’t planning the idea made him listless. Monday rolled around and Leo wasn’t home for the most part. Niles thought of almost every possible scenario, but so much of it came down to….what if it was  _ expensive? _

 

Niles liked Leo a lot, but he also knew that Leo had a tremendous amount of money at his disposal and he couldn’t ignore it as much as he liked. He wanted to be with Leo but the idea just kept popping into his head. What if this was about money? What if this requires money? What if this is expensive?

 

He thought they were happy together and he didn’t want to think into the future - they had only gone out a few days. But the idea of anything expensive made him nervous. Niles had lived on pennies his whole life and just living in Leo’s condo was a lot to take in. It was a big reason why it was hard for them to talk at first. 

 

But….he knew Leo now. And Leo knew him. And Leo cared about him and wouldn’t do anything to make him uncomfortable, right? Yes. That’s right. Niles phone buzzed and he nearly physically jumped.

 

A text from Leo. They were going to meet at a restaurant. Dress casually? Niles opened up his laptop and googled the address. It had very high ratings, as he expected, but didn’t seem overly fancy. 

 

He let out a long sigh. This wasn't going to be like work. They weren’t going to a place like his job. Okay. He could do this. 

 

***************

 

Niles only remembered as he arrived at the place of Leo’s choosing that dates were supposed to be  _ fun _ but then he remembered to be nervous. He walked into the building, a nice and cheerful place with old- fashioned French decor, and briefly spoke to the hostess. With a few words, he found Leo, who was waving and smiling at him. 

 

_ Yeah, like he’s ever going to dress casually in his life. He’s still wearing slacks. _

 

Niles could feel some relief seeing his boyfriend’s face and sat down opposite him. A waitress stopped by and gave him a water. 

 

Leo smiled warmly at Niles and excitedly delved into the conversation, telling him about his day.

 

“Did you find the place ok?”

 

“Yeah,”

 

“I think you’ll like it here. I’ve only come once before but the food is excellent and it’s very laid back,”

 

“Really?” Niles was genuinely curious.

 

“Well, obviously. I wouldn’t have chosen a place where you wouldn’t be comfortable,”

 

Oh.

 

Niles laughed, but it was a bit forced. 

 

“Hey,” Leo said, his voice soft.

 

“Yea?” Niles responded.

 

Leo reached out for Niles’ hand and rubbed it. “Everything will be ok, ok?”

 

Niles smiled back. “Ok.” He felt himself relax a bit. Maybe Leo was right. 

 

The waitress brought menus and while Leo looked busy for something to order. Niles wanted to laugh because the prices were totally normal and very unlike what he imagined.

 

Wow. 

The rest of dinner flowed naturally. Normal. Niles teased Leo as usual, while Leo fought back as his snarky self. They ate good food and laughed. Niles gave Leo the grape tomatoes from his dish. When the bill came and Niles  _ almost  _ felt his anxiety slap him Leo casually handled it.

 

“Do you wanna split it?”

 

“Yea,”

 

Niles wondered if the date was over. He was a little sad because he had been on edge almost the entire time. It had gotten dark while they were eating and he wondered if Leo had planned anything.

 

Leo slowly laced their fingers together.

 

“Wanna go somewhere else?”

 

“Sure,” Niles smiled. He meant it.

 

They got in Leo’s car and he drove through the city lights. So many times on a night like this Niles would be working, but now he was allowed to have a little fun. 

 

“Alright, we’re here.” 

 

“The Botanical Gardens?” 

 

“Apparently, everything is really pretty at night,” 

 

They bought tickets and went inside. It was a huge space, staged beautifully. A myriad of plant species bloomed everywhere, illuminated by the many, if not infinite, lights of the botanical gardens. There were a couple ponds here and there, shimmering with reflected lights. Leo and Niles held hands, staying close, as they walked through. Up above, you could see just a bit of starlight.

 

“So, tell me, Leo, how did you think this  _ event _ out?”

 

“Do you not like all the plants?” Leo laid his head against Niles shoulder.

 

“I didn’t say that. Just wanted to know how you planned everything.” Niles responded, grasping Leo’s hand tightly.

 

“Well….I know what you like to eat because I feed you,” Leo giggled. It was adorable.

 

Niles pressed a kiss to Leo’s forehead.

 

“I thought the garden would be romantic. Was I right?” he murmured.

Niles let go of Leo’s hand to wrap his arms around the man’s body.

 

“It’s perfect,” he said gently.

 

“Okay. Glad you liked it. I was so worried.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah…” Leo sighed.

 

“Next time,” Niles started, “I’ll pick everything,”

 

“Mmk,” Leo mumbled. 

 

“Leo,”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Thank you for tonight,” Niles smiled. He cupped Leo’s cheek with a hand. 

 

“Of course,” Leo replied, smiling so brightly.

 

Niles leaned in to kiss him. He needed to taste him again. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have so much to say about this. I really wanted this chapter to be fluffier but once I started writing it Niles fears and anxieties just came out and I feel like they are just so justified? As someone who works in food service and someone who used to not even have enough money to go out to eat with friends like these types of things are really stressful. but anyways I hope everyone enjoyed the chapter and sorry I took long to update! feel free to bother me on my twitter @blushingprince


	10. Please, please, touch me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sharing a bed! fun!

Niles tossed and turned violently. Sweat raked down his body and he clawed his own skin in fear. He was trapped in another nightmare, no more, no less. The haunting cold… pitch blackness and fear in the pits of his stomach. He opened his mouth to scream but could feel nothing coming out. The bad dreams hadn’t happened in a long time, especially since he started living with Leo, but here he was again trapped behind his eyelids. 

 

A warm hand? Someone? Pressed to his cheek. Soft whispers came. No. It must have been the dream lying. 

 

“Niles!” Leo nearly yelled. Niles’ eyelids snapped open and he found himself trembling. He reached for Leo and thankfully the man reached back. 

 

He opened his mouth to speak, but words failed him. He felt so small, so miniature and lost in the sheets and blankets. Leo wrapped his arms around Niles and whispered to him.

 

“...Just a dream. It’s okay. You’re safe.”

 

Niles warmed up to Leo’s arms, clinging for his life and inhaling the warm scent of the blonde. Yes….that was a nightmare. Not the first or last but much less frequent now. But with Leo beside him, everything seemed so much less scary. 

 

“How did you….know?” 

 

“That you were bothered?” Leo asked. “Well….I was….checking on you. Couldn’t sleep. I guess.”

 

“Checking on me? Like I’m a toddler?” Niles mused like he wasn’t still barely shaking.

 

“Yes. An oversized toddler.” Leo teased back. “I’m...glad I did.”

 

“Thank you, Leo.” Niles closed his eyes, meaning every word he said. Leo was so warm and comforting. He only wanted to stay like that for the rest of the night… But still, even though they had been dating, they technically were not sleeping in the same bed all the time. They hadn’t  _ slept together _ yet. Niles grew nervous. Was Leo going to leave? He should probably tell him it’s okay to leave. After all, Leo probably preferred to sleep in his far bigger, more luxurious bed. Why would he want to stay here and have Niles cling to him…

 

Leo pressed a sweet kiss to Niles’ forehead. “If you think I’m going to leave you and go back to my room, I think you are sorely mistaken,” he chuckled and the sound was musical.

Niles felt soft. He had to take a moment to collect his emotions, even though he was technically cuddled against the man. He returned a kiss to Leo’s cheek. 

 

“What did I ever do to deserve such a boyfriend?” he mused. 

 

Leo cupped Niles’ cheek, leaning in for a kiss. “Me? I wouldn’t know.” Smiling, he reached for Niles’ lips. “We will have to do something about you being such a blanket thief, though,” Leo cackled.

 

Niles pretended to look wounded and passed Leo more blankets. “Me, a blanket thief?”

 

“Why yes, I’d say the worst blanket thief in the household.”

 

They continued to whisper and mumble to each other till early in the morning, when they both fell asleep, curled against each other and smiles on their faces. Niles dreamt of nothing scary and when he awoke, Leo was still by his side. 

  
  


**************

 

Leo suggested the next day that Niles sleep in  _ his _ bed that night, to ward off nightmares of course. It was natural, they had done it before, and they were dating. Niles couldn’t help feeling a little nervous yet excited and happily agreed. 

 

Leo’s bed was spacious and soft, but Leo was softer and more inviting. It wasn’t nightmares that Niles was thinking of. As he spooned Leo, holding him close to his body, he felt  _ want. _ How would it feel to touch him more? Did Leo want to? Of course, the man was sound asleep and would lose it if he was awoken….but Niles wondered. It was Niles who said they should go slowly….but oh how Niles wanted. Every bit of skin he saw enticed him and the body heat he could feel through Leo’s clothes was enough. 

 

_ Enough _ . Niles needed to collect himself. He didn’t want to ruin anything by disturbing this simple invitation. After all, Leo simply wanted to make sure he didn’t have nightmares. Which was cute….he guessed….but sharing a bed just made him horny.

 

***************

 

What did Leo want? Niles couldn’t recall ever seeing him without a shirt on, even though they shared living quarters. He on the other side often emerged from the bathroom in only a towel. He couldn’t gage Leo’s desire. Leo was all prim and proper and well dressed. Niles wanted to see him naked and beneath him, roused with desire. It would probably be normal to talk about this in a relationship, but Niles was terrified of ruining anything. 

 

***************

 

Leo was a little frustrated with the slow progress in their relationship. He knew he should be patient, and he Niles wanted to go slow. He wanted to respect Niles wishes. But for God’s sake! It had been weeks and Niles hadn’t even so much touched him. Leo invited him to share a bed with him even, and they had only laid there. Leo was feeling the burn of sexual frustration. He wanted Niles and he wanted him bad. Was he going to have to make the first move? He didn’t feel quite that confident. What if Niles didn’t want him? What if… No….He just had to let Niles know he was willing, right? Niles might be hesitant. But why?

 

***************

 

Leo thought of the stupidest thing possible. A test, to see if it would arouse Niles. He was not very confident in himself and knew he could not initiate much right now. He left the shower and donned a pair of sweatpants but no shirt, as Niles often did. Leo headed to the kitchen for his favorite orange juice. 

 

_ This is so stupid. I’m so stupid. _

 

**************

 

_ What. The. Fuck. Why isn’t he wearing a shirt _ ? Niles turned his head from the television and watched Leo go to the fridge, his hair still wet, no shirt on, and grab a glass of juice.

 

_ What is going on?  _ Niles figured Leo could choose to not wear a shirt if he didn’t want to, it was his own house. But since he had never seen Leo shirtless before, he was going to take the opportunity to stare. 

 

Niles rose and skittered to the kitchen where he observed Leo. 

 

Leo glanced at him. “Can I help you?”

 

“No,” Niles poured his eyes over the pale skin and light hint of muscle, his eyes glazing over where Leo’s skin became hidden by pants.

 

“Okay….well I’m going to make dinner,” Leo said like an afterthought.

 

Niles was mildly confused. “Like that? Aren’t you cold?”

 

Leo frowned. “No, I like not wearing a shirt. In fact, I will start doing it more often now.”

 

Niles stared at Leo, waiting for him to realize what he said. What was going on with him? Did he do something wrong? Niles had been trying to be a good boyfriend but Leo seemed a little agitated. Then again, he was distracted too, because it was the first time seeing any of Leo’s skin. He couldn’t deny he wanted to see more. To change that expression with his own body. Niles tried to do the only thing he could think that would help.

 

“Would you like me to get you a shirt?” he offered.

 

Leo’s frown deepened. He seemed agitated. Niles was not used to this. It reminded him a bit of before they got together and confessed.

 

He stepped closer to Leo. “Tell me what’s wrong,” he said softly.

 

He could feel Leo emotionally pulling away for him, and so reached out and grabbed his hand, rubbing circles on it with his thumb.

 

“Tell me what you need, Leo,” he whispered.

 

There was a long silence before Leo spoke up.

 

“Do you… not want me?” Leo nearly choked on his words.

 

“What?” Niles was caught on his breath.

 

“You never touch me or try to. It’s been some time since we started dating and I guess…. I just figured… you don’t want me…”

 

Niles grabbed him and pressed their lips together in a heaty, in the moment kiss. Leo wrapped his arms around Niles and moaned softly as Niles entered his tongue into his mouth and slowly opened it. 

 

“You have no idea,” Niles said breathily, “just how much I want you,”

 

Niles picked Leo up and carried him to his bedroom, dropping him on his bed. Niles eyes were full of lust and he kissed him up and down, then pulling down Leo’s pants and underwear. Leo was already half hard and Niles reached for his cock, making Leo gasp. Niles stroked him till he was fully erect and Leo moaned and writhed underneath him, grabbing whatever he could. Niles finally pulled off all his clothes and pushed his legs apart so he could inch his face close to Leo’s erection. Leo could feel Niles’ hot breath on him and groaned. 

Slowly, Niles licked the tip. He wanted it to be good for Leo. As he Leo moved underneath him, making an assortment of sounds, he took the head in his mouth and sucked, stroking the base with his hands. Leo’s face was flush red and he moaned more loudly as Niles took more of his dick into his mouth. Niles began to deepthroat him and Leo  _ screamed _ . With one hand Niles was stroking his own dick and another he was grabbing Leo. Leo called out Niles’ name constantly as a prayer. Niles reached a finger into Leo’s ass as he continued to stroke and suck him hard. Within a few more strokes Leo came hard, in white spurts into Niles mouth. He lay boneless on his bed, engulfed in pleasure, barely registering that Niles swallowed his cum. 

 

Niles came up and kissed his cheek. Leo looked through hazy eyes at him.

 

“Did you swallow my cum?”

 

“Yep,”

 

“ _ Fuck, _ Niles…. I need. I need to do something for you.”

 

“What did you have in mind?” Niles grinned.

 

Leo sat up and palmed Niles’ very apparent erection. Niles softly groaned. “How about we start here?”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> safdad everytime I try to write something nice for them it gets a lil angsty  
> but I am legit so sorry it took me so long to update I'm in school now and I have a job so basically I have no time to do anything for myself   
> btw they still haven't had The sex yet  
> would love to know your thoughts!


	11. Stay with me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> talks about intimacy// charlotte stirs the big pot of problems

Niles was pounding into him. Leo lay on his stomach, grasping at sheets, eliciting the sweetest of honeyed moans. His boyfriend - no, his lover, continued to thrust deeply into him, conjuring those sickly sweet sounds from his mouth. He could feel a firm grasp on his hips that would surely leave a mark and the sound of grunts and groans from behind himself. Intense pleasure came when Niles reached his prostate and just as those raucous moans resounded off his lips he turned his head to see his beloved. 

 

_ Let me hear your voice. Let me see you. _

 

He grasped, reached out, with a bare hand, for that single person atop him, but touched nothing.  Tears began to well up in his eyes and he closed them. He would never open them.

 

**********

 

Leo woke up in his bed with the faintest tinge of sadness. Rubbing his eyes, he realized it was a dream. Ignoring his hard-on, he glanced to the side of the bed where Niles should be. After all they….last night… Leo blushed. Where was his boyfriend? He decided to hop in the bathroom for a quick cold shower. 

 

Leo’s first thought was to scamper off to the kitchen, and he was warmly met with the surprise of Niles having made coffee already. Leo smiled, thinking back to the first few times Niles visited the - no,  _ their _ \- apartment. Niles hated how fancy and big everything was. But now it really seemed like he was at home, even making coffee without Leo asking him. He watched Niles pour him a mug and couldn’t stop feeling warm inside. 

 

“Does coffee really make you that happy?” Niles eyed Leo.

 

Leo stirred his mug and laughed softly. “Maybe,”

 

He set down his mug and was surprised by an embrace from Niles. He could feel both the warmth and strong hold. Niles kissed the top of his head and it made a sunny grin wrap onto Leo’s face. He took the opportunity to kiss the man. Leo rested his head in Niles’ neck. He was so warm. 

 

“Last night wasn’t too much?” Niles just barely whispered.

 

It took a moment for Leo to process what Niles was asking.

“What? No - Why would you think that?” Leo tried his best to understand.

  
  


Niles sighed. “You know I care for you.” He reached his hand to caress Leo’s cheek and the blonde absolutely leaned into it. 

 

Leo brought his hand up to hold the hand on his face. “What are you afraid of?”

 

At first, Niles didn’t speak. “I don’t want to…….hurt you. I don’t want to be too much or too rough. I don’t want to do something you don’t like or that turns you off. I don’t want to break you. I want to be what you want and makes you feel good…” He swallowed thickly.

 

“Niles…” Leo began, placing his hands on his shoulders. “When I said I wanted to be with you, I didn’t mean one thing or another, I meant all of you. I want all of you. I’m not afraid to be with you.”

 

“Leo,” and his voice was begging, “am I really good enough for this?”

 

“I know you are,” Leo told him, bringing him close so he could hold him. 

 

“I’m sorry….I….left the bed in the early morning. I couldn’t stop thinking about these things.”

 

“It’s okay,” Leo smiled at him, genuine and happy.

 

Niles smiled back and kissed him, deep and low.

 

“Sooooo…..you’ve been thinking about these kinds of things…..” Leo casually slipped in.

 

“And you were worried I wasn’t?” Niles chuckled. “Oh, Leo, I never have any idea what goes on in your head.” 

 

*******************

 

It was another night shift at the restaurant, after all, life did go on, and Niles was clearing off tables. He always did gawk at the insurmountable sums of money people could spend here but he closed his eyes and kept going. But he felt better lately and maybe that reflected on his attitude. His sleep, food, and way of life had all been improved since moving in with Leo. That wasn’t weird, right? Perhaps he had been able to afford some new clothes for work, too, but that wasn’t….that wasn’t anything.

He would never want to go back to before - before he knew Leo. It wasn’t too much long ago, but it seemed so much warmer here. 

 

“Hey, Niles,” came a slippery voice.

 

“Charlotte,”

 

“You look good. Fresh,”

 

She wasn’t going to cut around the corners with him. She would tell him what she wanted and leave. God, Niles did not like her.

 

“Is that a new vest?”

 

“What does it matter to you? Don’t you have better things to do, like rummaging your hands in the pockets of the men here?”

 

She cackled and leaned her head back. 

 

“You can’t fool me,”

 

“Hey, who am I trying to fool?” Niles was getting agitated.

 

“You. Have. A. Sugar. Daddy.” She smirked. 

 

The look on Niles’ face was blind confusion as she walked away and one man’s name was on his mind.

 

_ Leo. _

 

_ Leo was his sugar daddy? No! They were in love!  _

 

Leo saved him when he was destitute. Leo gave him a home. Leo told him he loved him. Leo gave him purpose. How could Leo be…….that kind of person.

 

But he knew Leo was very wealthy from the beginning. Maybe he should just pick up and leave? No. No. No.. He needed to talk to Leo….

 

***************

Niles reached home in a less than ideal state, already having two panic attacks on public transit. The lock opened slowly and he plopped himself inside with much effort. Inside, he could hear the pitter patter of Leo’s slippers. The calm before the storm, perhaps. He could smell Leo’s cooking and knew part of him just wanted to ignore what Charlotte said and go back to being a couple.

 

He waited. Or decided to. He wasn’t sure if he should run away or not. 

 

“Niles~~” Leo entered the living room happy to see his boyfriend. Seeing his face he knew something was wrong.

 

Leo slowly approached his boyfriend and quietly asked him, “what’s wrong? Did something happen at work?”

 

Niles could only bring himself to nod. 

 

Leo breathed in and out. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I’m here for you.” He placed a hand on Niles’ arm. “I only want to help.”

 

_ This person? Helping me? But what does he want for me if he is only giving me money….. _

_ SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! LEO’S NOT LIKE THAT! _

 

_ He keeps telling me he loves me but…...FUCK FUCK FUCK SHUT UP _

 

“Niles!” Leo pressed a hand to the man’s face. “Don’t give yourself a panic attack,”

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

_ FFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK SHUT UP SHUP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP _

 

“Breathe, in, and out. It’s going to be okay. I’ve got you. I’m not going to let go of you ever.”

 

Despite Niles confused thoughts, he clung to Leo with every bit of will he had as tears streamed down his face.

 

“Charlotte says that you’re…...you’re….a sugar daddy,” Niles didn’t let go of Leo, as his tears continued. Leo stared back at him, at this man who had poured his soul out before him and now he had him in his hands. 

 

“I’m not that. I’m not a sugar daddy or someone who’s paying you off.” Leo cleared his throat. “I do have a considerable amount of money, but in no way, I am using it in a way to get sex from you. You also contribute to rent and the household. And I am not in a relationship with you for those types of reasons.”

 

“Then  _ why _ ,  _ why do you stay with me _ ?”

 

“Because I fucking love you goddammit. I love you, and that’s why I’m holding you when you’re crying and having a panic attack. That’s why I cook you dinner at night, that’s why I do your laundry, and that’s why I watch your dumb tv shows. It’s love, ok? No amount of money or sex could make me do these things.”

 

Leo wrapped his arms around Niles as he sobbed into his chest, wondering what kind of things Niles must have gone through in his life. Maybe, someday, he’d tell him. He felt Niles shaking body and knew nothing but love and respect. Love and worship. No man was like Niles and he’d have no one else. 

 

Later, Leo moved them to his bed where Niles could get comfier and forced the man to change clothes. Leo whipped up some pasta and Niles ate it quietly. They slept soundly, cuddling each other. He listened quietly to the sounds of Niles’ breathing after he fell asleep. 

 

_ I’ll protect you. _

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woohoo im on winter break I hope some people are still following this story!   
> poor Niles I'm sowwy

**Author's Note:**

> I have not written anything in months I feel like I have lost my inspiration. But here this is my new project. If you were reading my you deserve better fic don't worry I haven't abandoned it. I feel like this is a little ooc but leo is a bit older here so....shrugs.  
> my twitter as @blushingprince


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